Saturday 25 April 2009

Last night..

last night was absolutely discusting. I am not one for the whole 'purge after everything has entered your mouth' but i knew last night that purging would make me feel better. I was on msn at the time to my ana friend, and i couldnt shift the feeling of needing to get things out and needing to purge so off i wrote 'BRB' thinking that it would be over quickly and i would be back.. but it was long drawn out and horrible.. dont think it helped by the amount of water i had- i was discusted with what came out. I took my laptop into the bathroom and played some thinspo music and around half an hour later was finally done, but of which ended with tears. Its ironic how i can bring up the contents of my stomach and some blood- which scared me, then an hour later feel like doing it again... whats the deal with that? Its amazing how quickly purging can make you feel better though, gets the badness out. But im not going to do it all the time, as i had no sleep from my reflux disease being foul and feel like my chest, throat ect was on fire... not pleasent.xx

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